The power of a smile.

• By Johanna Nuding+
• Posted in Italy, Life, Personal Stories, Travel, Unsolicited Advice
• On August 31, 2012
• 2 Comments.

I attended a networking aperitivo (happy hour) yesterday evening for an organization I joined shortly after my arrival in Bologna. InterNations.org is a global online community for expatriates living and working abroad and provides a forum to exchange tips, advice, job leads, ideas, etc. This was my first social event with the organization and it happened to be hosted at a location I’d been anxious to check out – La Corte di Bacco in Corte Isolani (a beautiful space with Roman-Gothic architecture and an open-air passage way lined with art galleries, shops, fine dining, etc. leading from Strada Maggiore to Piazza Santo Stefano.)

The place was bustling with people upon my fashionably late arrival. I stood in line, checked in, and received my name tag and a champagne cork which was to be exchanged for a complimentary glass of vino or bubbly.

I walked straight to the wine set-up, traded my cork for a cup-o-courage and then turned to face the crowd of about 75 people clustered about buried in conversation. I hadn’t done this in a really long while – networking without knowing a single person in the room. I felt like I was back on the playground trying to double dutch, watching two giant white ropes circling in opposite rhythm waiting for me to make my entrance and not fall flat on my face. I scanned the group in the courtyard and noticed the entrance to the quaint bar on the other side of the crowd. Okay, I’ll just walk over there to the bar and see what happens.

I scooted, shuffled and scusi‘d my way through the strangers and crossed the threshold into the bar. It was quite warm inside, so there were few patrons indoors which made the situation feel less overwhelming for me. It was time to start double-dutching. I turned on my brightest smile and introduced myself to the small cluster of people standing by the entrance. I was pleasantly surprised when the first handsome gentleman began speaking to me with the most charming irish accent (not as charming as yours, though, Emma Kate!). The Irish have a pleasant way of making you feel comfortable, no matter where in the world you might be. That’s probably why I always feel at home in an Irish pub…that and the boundless supply of Guinness and Jameson.

Speaking of Jameson…after I finished my free glass of bubbly, I bellied up to the bar and asked the handsome old bartender for a Jameson and soda. He returned with Jameson 12-year/Special Reserve. I smiled and asked him how much that was going to set me back, but he didn’t understand. I looked to my new irish friend, Michael to help translate while I stood there smiling at the silver-haired man behind the bar. He never took his eyes off of me, smiling, shaking his head and repeating “Bella, bella, bella. For you, special price.” After a moment, he began pouring the tallest glass of Jameson I’ve ever had. I paid 5€. And then I had another. And one more after that.

In between the sipping and savoring of my beloved Jameson I put a lot of faces with names and email conversations I’d exchanged with people through InterNations.org. I met and had a lovely conversation with an economics professor and one of his PhD students from Iran. I met a fellow, fiery lioness (who actually shares my exact birthday) – Monica Ann from New Jersey. She is an interpreter who has spent close to 30 years in Italy, but still has her Jersey accent. Jersey is a long way from Texas, but it still felt like home listening to her speak. And, of course, I met more beautiful, intelligent, friendly Italians that make me want to make my stay here in Bologna permanent.

By the end of the event, I was on a first name basis with Sergio, the owner/bartender. I felt like I was breaking up with him when I told him I had to leave. I was going to join a smaller group at Celtic Druid, a great Irish pub by Piazza Maggiore. Sergio took my glass from me and retrieved the Jameson 12-year/Special Reserve off the shelf and began unscrewing the lid. I shouted “Basta!” and placed my hand over the glass. He didn’t listen…Sergio poured the whiskey through my fingers into the glass.

It was a sad moment walking away from that glass, but I just couldn’t drink any more of it and keep my wits about me. Sergio understood that, but do you know what his solution was? Stappiamo una bolla. He opened a bottle of champagne and poured a glass for himself and the four of us left standing at the bar. (I don’t care who you are or how much you’ve had to drink…you don’t turn down nice champagne.) We toasted and I ended my night at La Corte di Bacco, the place named after the Roman god of wine and intoxication, in proper fashion.

I won Sergio over with my smile and he won me over with his heavy handed pour, generosity, charm and of course…his smile.

I promised to come back and see him. My bar tab was only 10€ and he wouldn’t let me tip him. I’d be a fool NOT to go back in there!

Today I want to remind you of the power of your smile. A genuine, open-hearted smile will open doors to opportunities in business, friendship, love and adventure. A warm smile shows you’re friendly, happy, approachable, and confident. And, probably my favorite part…smiles are contagious. A single smile can turn on another and another and another until an entire room is bathed in beautiful happy energy. A smile really can do all of that. There’s always going to be an exception…that one grouch that doesn’t want to smile or be smiled at…they’re my favorite people to smile at. The Leo in me loves the challenge. Even if I can’t make them smile, I know they’re wondering what I’m up to which makes me smile even more. So, I win anyway, grouchy pants!

You know I love giving you real life examples so here are two everyday scenarios where a smile can save your ass:
1. Lost? Have an address, but just can’t seem to find what you’re looking for? Approach a stranger on the street with a sour look on your face and you might get maced. Approach with a smile and you’ll likely get directions.
2. Don’t know anyone at a party? Stand there frowning and people will talk about you all night. Stand there smiling and people will talk with you all night.

Now, get out there, flash those pearly whites and start charming the pants off people (figuratively or literally….it’s up to you)!